On a confused rainy evening

In the journey of life, you often come to the crossroads where you look straight into the mirror and see somebody you don't know. You look into the reflection hoping to catch a glimpse of yourself. Every minute, every second of your life thereafter is to try and understand the person in that reflection. Clear the haze.

People around you seem happy, content. They look like they have their life figured. You stand on a pedestal of ambition, unsteady and unsure about your plans for the future and with only hope in the eyes gazing at the elusive target over the horizon. Will you make it big in the next 10 years? Will somebody else overtake you? What will people think of you after 15years? In the middle of all this, there often lies a question masqueraded by all these misgivings that you fail to discover it until it's too late: 'Will you be happy?'

I wish I could be happy just sitting with my dog all day, talking about politics and sports. I wish I could be happy munching on chips and getting fat. I wish I could be happy just walking around in the park, eat idli vada for an hour, sleep well into the morning. I wish. Every day is a balancing act, balancing between your activities you do to fund your existence and the activities which feed your soul. Happiness is an elusive animal, the more you chase after it the more you get tired.

But just go out there and do the things that you like, the things which you think are right. It might take a while, you might get rich along the way, gain weight, gain friends, get famous. But happiness will only find you, as long as you do the things you want.

The only challenge is not to confuse all these things with happiness, for happiness is surreal. You will know when you have found it. So if somebody asks me about my aim in life, it is simple. To be happy. I only need to figure out how!

Are YOU ready for the Aam Aadmi Politics?

The political scene in the country looks a little more rosy than usual. Fresh faces and ideas are being woven into the Indian political fabric. A new breed of politicians are coming through.

When Anna Hazare started his movement, he captured the imagination of an entire nation reeling under the burden of living with a corrupt, indifferent government. Like all attempts to 'change the system', it fizzled out for the simple reason that real change cannot happen unless you enter the system. There came the man, Arvind Kejriwal. An IIT graduate, a man of impeccable character. Or so they say. Having retired as the Joint Commissioner of the Income Tax Department, he walked into the political spoltlight when he transitioned from the role of an activist to that of a politician by founding the Aam Aadmi Party (AAP).

The AAP has been hugely successful in consolidating the urban vote in Delhi and looks likely to emerge the kingmaker in the Delhi elections. I would be greatly disappointed if they side with either Congress of BJP however. But that discussion is for another day! I am sitting in from of my machine with two monitors. One monitor only for election results. This phenomenon of Indian elections has captured my attention from almost a decade now. Politics, money, liquor, women, caste. You know what I mean. This love and fantasy brought me to come accross Yogendra Yadav, one of the country's foremost political annalists. I used to listen to him for long periods when he spoke on CNN-IBN etc. and was fascinated by the factors which affect an election in India. Believe me, they are mind boggling.  This is the exact reason why I will accuse an Indian politician to be anything but smart.  Anyway, looking at Yogendra Yadav moving to AAP made me to believe that these guys are serious. They mean business.

I realize that the top layer of AAP will be incorruptible. If Arvind Kejriwal also turns corrupt, I will lose my faith in humanity. However, every second guy I talk to says AAP is the way to go. But I want to ask this question one of my favorite commentators, Swapan Dasgupta, asked "Are you ready for AAP?". It got me thinking. Everyone who says 'yes' think about this:

• Have you never paid bribe to the traffic police? You could have paid 300 and got the bill. Instead you paid 50.
• Even simpler, have you ever jumped the queue at the bill counter? 
• Paid a little to get your PAN card faster?
• Parked your car on the footpath meant for pedestrians?

I know the argument that the system is a problem which forces you to do this. But you have taken the easy way out. You could have paid 300, but you paid 50. So did I.

We have all been beneficiaries of this system and I don't think we are ready to let it go so soon. We have slept with the beast for so long and maybe we feel lonely without it next to us on bed.

Let us for a minute presume that AAP comes to power. They cannot change the system overnight, so let's say they take 5yrs. Are you ready to take the high road? It will be hard. Very hard. Lonely. You will have to get back to the queues. No more fast track processing of files. No more taking the shortcut. No more parking on the footpath. This is like arrange marriage going bad. The girl looks amazing the day you meet her and you are smitten by her. You get married and move in together. Then you realize that she is a stickler for rules. Get up at 6am. Fold your shirts. Wash your own clothes. Clean the toilet. Pick up the dishes. She is right, but you cannot take it. Man, you are screwed!

I wish AAP can come to power for fulfilling all the aspirations of a country waiting for change. But I strongly feel that they are walking into a trap right now. Everybody is welcoming them, but when AAP start putting their policies into place we will feel the heat. Then slowly, but surely, the halo around AAP will go away and all reasons will be found to go away from them.

I am not being pessimistic. I may be a fantasist, but I am also realistic. I know the veil of hypocrisy behind which we all hide while we damage our country. Think about what you wish for, these are some good people giving their lives for your sake.  This country is great, it deserves someone who can restore the once glorious position it was in.

A little too much love?

Every once in a while, you know that there is something special happening right in front of you. You will know this if you have seen Yuvraj Singh going on a rampage and scoring 6 sixes in an over.

Every once in a while, you realize that you are seeing something historic happening right in front of you. You will know this when if you saw Barrack Obama taking oath as the President of The United States of America.

And very rarely do you realize that there is something extraordinary happening and by the time you do that you might have missed it. 24 years was a long time to miss but when the little man just over 5' 5" walked back to the pavilion at the Wankhede for possibly the last time in the history of the world, you knew you had missed it. You knew you would do anything to go back and watch it all over again.

Fists pumping, The Rawalpindi Express steamed in and bowled a bouncer at a 100mph. At the striker's end, the little man hardly moved and only at the last moment, there was a little magical flick. The ball was over the boundary. Some of the greatest bowlers of the world have fallen, but the greatness of an individual is not about how many people he can defeat but the amount of joy he can provide by that victory. There have been a million sixes in the history of the game, but look back and you will realize that the 300 odd sixes by Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar gave more joy than any other.

He might be "just" a cricketer and cricket might "just" be a game, but Sachin Tendulkar put Indian on the map in terms of sports. Yes, there are others too. But it is not everyday that you have an Indian sportsman acknowledged at the Wimbledon. It is not every day that an Indian sportsman gets a standing ovation from a foreign crowd (read England, Australia). When you have somebody who has carried the hopes of a nation for 24 years, you know you have been endowed with a blessing.

In a country that is crippled with third world problems such as poverty and infanticide, there is always an argument that there is too much attention being given to an individual's retirement. But, really? Here is a man whose century gave joy and hope to an entire country. Stories such as that of Sachin are not only magical, but also gives hope to millions that fairy tales are not just in the books. A little boy from a middle class family in Mumbai can grow to be an icon who is almost worshiped. In my opinion, this talent and this contribution needs to be celebrated. Yes, he might have made money. Yes, he might be selfish. But who cares? He is India's pride and that needs to be celebrated. He is the flower that grows out from the pavement. It is his time to shine.

We don't have money for tackling poverty, why spend on Sachin? I have heard this a lot. Yes, you need to spend on poverty. Why are we not spending currently? Because all the damn money is locked up in somebody's pockets. To tackle poverty, will you stop music and art? Sachin can never cure poverty, but his victory gives joy and happiness to the people of a country desperately looking for things to be proud about. Every run scored, every victory achieved is a symbolic step forward for a country's sport and that is an achievement for the country. Its like asking, "how will going to the moon solve poverty?".  Every step taken in any field is a proud moment for the country and needs to be celebrated. It is a different story that a country like India has other problems which prevent the money flowing down to the right places.

It has been 24years and it has passed us by in the blink of an eye. It is time to celebrate, for we may never get another chance to acknowledge the magical journey we have all been a part of. I have spent days trying to find the right words, but I cannot find anything else but "Thank you". Thank you Sachin, you have been among India's greatest possessions and we are proud of it. #ThankYouSachin

Nirbhaya verdict: Is it the beginning?

The judge pronounced the verdict. The country erupted. The convicts and their families went down on their knees.

The death sentence in the Nirbhaya case is definitely a landmark judgement and in a sense, justice delivered to the family. However, what is indeed baffling is that the majority of the media and the public believe that this is the victory we were all looking for. Is this it?

If you look at it, the rapists are a product of our own system. Irrespective of how we try to move the blame away from the administration, I find it hard to believe that. When you watch NatGeo and see an animal tear into the flesh of another, you feel sick. But that is the natural behavior of the animal. Have you ever asked the question: "What if the rapists did not know that what they were doing was unacceptable?". What if the answer is no? I think that is the scariest part of this whole affair. If you take a baby and bring it up in a colony of animals, it will turn out to be an animal only. Punishment is for those people who know what is right/wrong and still continue to do the wrong thing. I am in no way saying that this punishment was not necessary; it very much was. However, this incident signifies much more. Much much more.

What Kiran Bedi spoke was so simple, yet something the administration seems to miss. "The duty of the parent is not just to bring the baby into the world, but also to ensure that it grows up to be an acceptable human being".  But what if the parents are fighting a battle just for survival? Where is the time for education, values and moral education? This whole thing represents the growing rot in the very heart of the society.

Having a rotten heart and still building your muscles at the gym will never make you a strong man. This seems to be the case with India.

Believing that the punishments is our answer is like saying that all the kids in the school who make obvious spelling mistakes should be thrown out of the school, rather than questioning why the child is not learning.

The rapists who will be hung are the products of your society, your system. You failed in ensuring they became acceptable human beings. Now, you just shoot them. But it is not one isolated incident, so it takes us back to the original question. Why did they become like that? I find it hard to comprehend how the punishment will deter the rapists from future acts. It is not that there is a rapist-colony and they all discuss the day-to-day rapes, do they? I am sure the rapes happen in the remotest parts of the country and they are not even aware of this incident and this judgement.

The remotest parts of this great nation live in the dark age. Believe me, they do. Do some reading and digging around and it will become very evident that it is a scary situation. The rot is evident. Incidents like this happen and go unreported in all parts of the country. When these kinds of people travel to the cities and one of these incidents come to the country's attention, the big uproar begins. But believing that this death-sentence is going to solve anything is ludicrous. But it is a beginning, I hope it is not the end.

Imagine you are running a bakery. Out of every 100 loaves of bread, 5 of them have worms in them. You can either wait for the customer to complain, apologize and replace it; or investigate where the worms are coming from and eliminate it. It just depends on the kind of bakery you are running.

Again, administration. When the poor girl got raped, we failed as a society. The punishment is just a curtain drawn over our guilt. A veil of hypocrisy through which we continue to witness the society fall apart.

I hope it does not stop at this. The great nation deserves much more.

Why the IPL scandal broke my heart

The day the IPL fixing reports came out, I had my heart broken. There was something wrong with the world at that moment and faith in humanity was waning. I tuned in to watch the news. As usual, Arnab was reaching his crescendo and the noise was unbearable. My favorite TV personality Rajdeep Sardesai was running a very clean debate and as much as it hurt me, I keenly listened to the details. The cricket world was entering its darkest hour.

I thought I was fortunate to see some of India's greatest cricket moments. Sachin lifting the World Cup; that day I knew the whole country celebrated with me. Dravid and Laxman outplayed the Aussies on one of the finest Indian cricketing days; I know the whole world applauded along with me. Then now I am seeing this as well. All this only reenforces my belief that we don't deserve the likes of Sachin, Dravid, Laxman and many others. Well, that discussion is for another day!

What interested me the other day was Harsha Bhogle's excellent insight into this that got me thinking. He said "IPL is just a microcosm of the world outside". So true, isn't it? After all, IPL is nothing but a mirror image of the world outside. Money, girls and a farce. And people keep cheering, year after year. Therefore, some people might question why concentrate on the IPL fiasco when there are 'important' things (read government,economy etc.) to worry about. IPL is afterall a tamasha isn't it?

But why is it so personal for us?

Think about all the factors which can possible unite a nation. Government? Ok, no jokes. Religion? That is the last thing it would do. It is Sport which does that. Cricket does that for India. When Sachin drives one through the covers, every Indian celebrates. When Dravid slowly but surely kills a bowling attack, every Indian thanks the higher spirit. Every Hindu, Muslim and Christian does it. Then there is Laxman who toyed around with the world's best bowling attack for a whole day. Caste, creed, age did not get matter during the celebration. If you look at this, an entire nation is captivated by the sport. In India especially, cricket is a religion and this scandal has hit our gods.

It is a known fact that a sport can life the spirit of an entire nation. Like in the movie Cinderella Man where James J. Braddock lifts an entire nation deep in economic depression, cricket is more than just a television event for most of Indians. When Sachin walks into bat, he is not just living his dream. He is walking in to bat for a billion souls. When Ganguly dances down the pitch, it is not just him who lofts the bowler for a six. Somewhere in Bengal, a thousand hearts dance at the same time.

Amidst all the rot in the society, cricket was one thing which was sacred where the fairy tale could still be lived. India winning the World Cup was indeed a fairy tale. Your life might be bad, you salary might be a joke and you a joke to your wife. But the sport always gives you hope. It gives you the belief that dreams can be achieved no matter what. And this has been hit. A sword dipped in the poison called greed has been plunged deep into the heart of this nation, and I don't know how we will recover. This might be a few crores which has exchanged hands, but for me this is worse than all the other scams. You have taken away something sacred from us. This is nothing but sacrilegious.

But some may say, the writing was on the wall. Well, hearts are always broken in love stories.

Why I do not want to vote this time

One of the first things I remember from my Civics class in school is mugging up the Fundamental Rights and Fundamental Duties of an Indian citizen. It did not make much sense back then, but I distinctly remember that one of my duties as a citizen was to vote when I was eligible to. Well, I also remember that the Prime Minister was responsible for the 'development' and that the President/Governor was an apolitical member in the state's machinery. So much for education.

I have voted every single time. Initially for the thrill of it, and then with real thought. My corporator is the wife of an ex-HAL employee who had a windfall when he sold his land and whom I had never seen before in my life; I still voted. My government put up MLAs for sale like the IPL auction; I still voted. Ministers were caught watching porn in the assembly, people who could not read and write were given ministerial berths; I still voted. And now, I don't want to. It is not because I don't feel a responsibility to 'vote for change', but because I am not satisfied with the choice.

If somebody gives you 5 rotten apples and tells you to choose one, what would you do? I would not choose any. In fact, 'I made a choice not to choose'. In that scenario, one cannot accuse me of failing in my duty. Giving nothing to choose from and accusing the citizen of failing in his/her duty is heresy. Wise men back then told 'vote wisely', not just vote. Anyway, this again brings up the topic of "null vote" or "reject-all-candidates" where the voter can register to vote and also exercise his vote but in fact makes a choice of not choosing any of the candidates. This is exactly what I want and also many people across the country. Believe it or not, I have asked Kiran Bedi about this (through social media) and she did mention that this is on the Lokpal's primary objectives.

So, is this not present in the current system? It is. It is called Rule 49-O. A registered voter can excercise his null vote. So why is it not effective? Firstly, the paper ballot had this option where the voter could drop a blank paper; but the EVMs do not have this. The voter needs to personally tell the election officer that he wants to exercise a null-vote. This is a bloody violation of the rights of the citizen! His choice should be a secret. Also, the logic of the null vote should ideally be: if the total number of null votes in a constituency is greater than the number of votes of the winning candidate of the constituency, that election is considered to "null and void". However, in our case: the null votes are just discarded and the winner is chosen. This system is just to provide to solace to those people who want to get a sense of satisfaction by voting, but the vote really makes no difference.


I wonder if I am actually failing in my duty when I don't vote this time. Maybe I will get that mark on my finger, pretend that I made a difference and feel happy. But I hope somebody gives a good choice this time around. One good apple and I will take it, does not matter who is giving it.

Be a dog, all your life!

Dedicated to my dear friend KV Bharat, who is getting engaged today. Spread the love mate. Be a dog!

Everybody has one of those days when everything around is irritating. Everything happening around is wrong, anything anybody says is wrong. You just feel like you have to take it out on people around, and it is usually someone close to you who gets the worst of it. Your wife or husband or girlfriend or boyfriend. Rest assured, you will get it back too. But what about your dog? I have shouted at my dog many a time, and I am not too proud of it. But the very next minute, he comes back and licks my feet wanting to be cuddled. I am amazed that an animal can be that evolved that it can love without any qualms.

I have heard many arguments that a dog has the intelligence of a 4year old, a dog is not an evolved creature, a dog is not very intelligent. Well, maybe that is the answer. We human-beings think too much, that is the problem. If I love him, will he take care of me later? If I love her, will she marry me? He is dark. Can I love him? We think so much that somewhere we lose track of the true emotion of love. I have learnt this from my dog and I can now tell that dogs are much better creatures than humans. When somebody calls you a dog, smile. It is a good thing!

There is this movie called Marley & Me. If you haven't watched, I suggest you do it. You will be happy that you did. Here is a quote from that:

"A dog has no use for fancy cars, big homes, or designer clothes. A water log stick will do just fine. A dog doesn't care if your rich or poor, clever or dull, smart or dumb. Give him your heart and he'll give you his. How many people can you say that about? How many people can make you feel rare and pure and special? How many people can make you feel extraordinary?"

Seriously, about how many people can you say the same? At the time when people have absolutely no scruples, when people are ready to murder their own kin for money; can you really find someone who can give you their hearts unconditionally? I guess some people can, and they can thanks their stars for that. I have heard many people say "he is not worth it". I did not understand the meaning earlier, but after I have my dog I realize how ludicrous that statement is. Love was an emotion created to be spread unconditionally. When my dog loves me so much, I sometimes wonder what would happen if my dog questioned itself "Is he worth it?" Hell no, he would stop looking at me I guess! Like people say, maybe the dogs have the intelligence of a 4year old. That is very apt. A child can love a person unconditionally. A child does not care whether the other person is dark, SC/ST, crippled etc. But somewhere down the road, as we grow old, we get corrupted. Corrupted by the socitey around, by the people around and by ourselves. We bind ourselves in shackles which are unnecessary, limit ourselves to quench our selfishness. I wish I can be that child again, who does not think twice before loving a person.

I have found my life's calling. To be as good a person that my dog already thinks I am. To be worthy of that pure love.

If you have found another "dog" in your life, thank your stars. Somebody up there must really like you!